A letter of appreciation
A letter I sent to the woman and activist behind 'Scarleteen':
Hello Heather,
I've been reading your journal @ femme erotic since I'm 18, and for some reason I felt like I had to send you an email today, not even sure if it was the right email adress - but as it is often with words, what matters is to spill it out, not to actually have them read.
I live in France and have been reading blogs for 5 years now - I can't even recall how I found your website in the first place, but surely it was via Scarletletters. In those 5 years lots of changes turned me into the woman I am now, and I welcome those which will come my
way in the next 5. You know them, those changes which mark a woman's life so powerfully - the first sexual experiments, the first broken hearts, the discovery of what it means and entails to be a woman, not only physically, but within a sociological frame.
For personal reasons I felt the need to learn more about feminism these past two years. As a way to get to know myself better, and maybe because I'm a political sciences major, I needed to learn more and gain different perspectives about gender-based issues. And because i've been subjected to sexist remarks more than once in the past years, and naturally felt the need to understand the roots of such behaviours.
I've also lived in Vancouver this year, interning for a Dance festival, and truly discovered a culture which is radically different than Europe in so many manys. The way women are protrayed and treated seemed so radically different. You'd go clubbing and suddenly realise
that those hip hop bling bling videos with naked women 'giving' themselves to men are not fantasies, but that society as a whole helps women to perpertuate this very role. I won't even mention the TV shows about plastic surgery, the yellow press, and all that crap, because as
you say, "you can turn the tv off" - but it's disheartenning to see the impact of it all on women, and young men just the same, mind you.
And even worse, the fact that when you underline those problems, you're being called a prude, or worse.
Anyways - point is, i did listen to lots of voices within the feminism movement this year, took gender studies classes in the past -taught by a fantastic male teacher, no less-, talked about it all with lots of women and girl friends, and came to the conclusion that most feminist
and/or equality for genders speeches are tainted with negation and accusations. It came to my mind while I was reading Germaine Greer's 'The whole woman'. It's a seriously sensational book, written to create reactions, created to be controversial and raise awareness, and one can only be grateful to Greer for her hard work. But finishing her book left a bad taste in my mouth - for she spends lines after lines fiercly accusing others -men, society, the media establishment- of everything you can think of.
It left me thinking, 'Everything she says is true, a lot has yet to be done to really integrate gender equality in people's minds, but she doesn't inspire women to feel pride and happiness, fullfillness and power, and this just because it's great to be a woman, as opposed to a
'bad/incomplete version of men'. It leaves women bitter, angry and maybe even more lost'.
This thought came to me again this morning while I was at the hairdresser reading some Elle magazine. A writer was interviewe'd, and she was quoting saying 'Men are happy women" and "Men don't know the burden of feminity and maternity". Which to some extent is true, they
will never undersand the struggles and the responsabilities attached to these notions, respectively. But how can you just say that and walk away? How can women ever feel content with themselves when such discourses (even if the so called feminist field) are so bloody
negative? We know damn well where the problem originates from, and we
have the progressive tools to try to fix it, even if they are never sufficiant, especially in the USA as it stands now. But what good will it make to give women the same rights as men if deep down they still feel inferior and repressed?
Point is, Heather - yes there is a point to this email- you're just about the only writer who truly knows how to inspire women to take a second look at themselves and start to love what they see for what they are.
Powerful human beings.
Your posts are incredibly truthful and to the point, and they make readers like me want to keep up the fight but this time not with anger, but pride. And that's just about the most important aspect of activism I can think about, may that be in fights against sexism, racism and all kind of discriminations.
Thank you, Heather, and I fucking mean it.
Jessica
I've been reading your journal @ femme erotic since I'm 18, and for some reason I felt like I had to send you an email today, not even sure if it was the right email adress - but as it is often with words, what matters is to spill it out, not to actually have them read.
I live in France and have been reading blogs for 5 years now - I can't even recall how I found your website in the first place, but surely it was via Scarletletters. In those 5 years lots of changes turned me into the woman I am now, and I welcome those which will come my
way in the next 5. You know them, those changes which mark a woman's life so powerfully - the first sexual experiments, the first broken hearts, the discovery of what it means and entails to be a woman, not only physically, but within a sociological frame.
For personal reasons I felt the need to learn more about feminism these past two years. As a way to get to know myself better, and maybe because I'm a political sciences major, I needed to learn more and gain different perspectives about gender-based issues. And because i've been subjected to sexist remarks more than once in the past years, and naturally felt the need to understand the roots of such behaviours.
I've also lived in Vancouver this year, interning for a Dance festival, and truly discovered a culture which is radically different than Europe in so many manys. The way women are protrayed and treated seemed so radically different. You'd go clubbing and suddenly realise
that those hip hop bling bling videos with naked women 'giving' themselves to men are not fantasies, but that society as a whole helps women to perpertuate this very role. I won't even mention the TV shows about plastic surgery, the yellow press, and all that crap, because as
you say, "you can turn the tv off" - but it's disheartenning to see the impact of it all on women, and young men just the same, mind you.
And even worse, the fact that when you underline those problems, you're being called a prude, or worse.
Anyways - point is, i did listen to lots of voices within the feminism movement this year, took gender studies classes in the past -taught by a fantastic male teacher, no less-, talked about it all with lots of women and girl friends, and came to the conclusion that most feminist
and/or equality for genders speeches are tainted with negation and accusations. It came to my mind while I was reading Germaine Greer's 'The whole woman'. It's a seriously sensational book, written to create reactions, created to be controversial and raise awareness, and one can only be grateful to Greer for her hard work. But finishing her book left a bad taste in my mouth - for she spends lines after lines fiercly accusing others -men, society, the media establishment- of everything you can think of.
It left me thinking, 'Everything she says is true, a lot has yet to be done to really integrate gender equality in people's minds, but she doesn't inspire women to feel pride and happiness, fullfillness and power, and this just because it's great to be a woman, as opposed to a
'bad/incomplete version of men'. It leaves women bitter, angry and maybe even more lost'.
This thought came to me again this morning while I was at the hairdresser reading some Elle magazine. A writer was interviewe'd, and she was quoting saying 'Men are happy women" and "Men don't know the burden of feminity and maternity". Which to some extent is true, they
will never undersand the struggles and the responsabilities attached to these notions, respectively. But how can you just say that and walk away? How can women ever feel content with themselves when such discourses (even if the so called feminist field) are so bloody
negative? We know damn well where the problem originates from, and we
have the progressive tools to try to fix it, even if they are never sufficiant, especially in the USA as it stands now. But what good will it make to give women the same rights as men if deep down they still feel inferior and repressed?
Point is, Heather - yes there is a point to this email- you're just about the only writer who truly knows how to inspire women to take a second look at themselves and start to love what they see for what they are.
Powerful human beings.
Your posts are incredibly truthful and to the point, and they make readers like me want to keep up the fight but this time not with anger, but pride. And that's just about the most important aspect of activism I can think about, may that be in fights against sexism, racism and all kind of discriminations.
Thank you, Heather, and I fucking mean it.
Jessica
posted by Boris at 7:14 PM
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